"My Wife Doesn’t Understand Me" & The Other Little White Lies Of Phone Sex

Phone sex is based in fantasy. Even those calls which seem more like therapeutic counseling or friendly chit-chat sessions occur because the caller believes in the fantasy of the girl on the other end of the line. This is not to say that you, the PSO, are not truly a sexy (understanding, dominating, garter-belt-and-stocking-not-sweat-pant-wearing etc.) person — but the persona you cultivate and market is what callers are initially responding to and believe in enough to continue to pay for your services. You are The Fantasy Girl. At all times. Forget that at your own peril.

But callers also create their own phone sex characters or personalities.

Some do it to envelope themselves in the full fantasy. On the phone, and in other interactions with you, they are taller/smaller, richer/poorer, have more hair, a smaller or larger tool; it’s endless.

In some cases, they are escaping unpleasant realities, from wheelchairs and job losses to recent bitter break-ups. In others, they seek professional phone sex services to fully insert themselves into the role play — developing characters that they put on, like costumes. No longer satisfied with stories about swash-bucking pirates taking maids, they want to be in the story. (To participate as pirate or maid, who knows? *wink*)

No matter what his reason, the professional phone sex operator just goes along with whoever, whatever, the caller says he is.

Oh, the number of girls I’ve seen lose phone sex income because they waste their time trying to figure out what’s true or not about a caller! What a waste of time. What lost opportunities. As a phone sex professional, what your callers say is true to you as long as a call lasts. And it’s true too for every future call — until you are told differently.

But of course you can’t believe everything they say.

His wife isn’t necessarily a bitch. Or ill. Or dead. Or whatever he says. Hell, he may not ever have been married. Maybe it’s just easier for him to play the role of a married man on the phone. Maybe he feels it further masks his identity. Maybe his fantasy taboo is enhanced by the naughty idea of cheating or being caught. Maybe he thinks you’ll be less judgmental of a man who “can’t get it that way at home” than you would be of a man who’s too uncomfortable to tell his lover what gets him off. Maybe he pretends to be married simply because he feels that would make him more sympathetic. Who knows? He says he’s married; he’s married. Just work with it.

The are only two times the caller’s fantasy persona or little white lies matter:

* One, during those therapeutic calls when such details help you, the PSO, to understand the client’s situation or needs.

* Two, when the caller’s fantasy persona get in the way of him actually feeling understood and accepted.

In either case, the onus is on the caller to be honest — or continue to suffer from less than satisfying services.

As a phone sex operator, your job is to be as emotionally accessible and understanding as you can to encourage your client to open up. But it really is up to him to give you the information you need to meet his needs.

Callers, at this point I must address you specifically. 

If you feel that your phone sex fantasy-self is getting in the way, if you feel the persona you project is actually prohibiting the PSO from pushing your hot buttons, go ahead and change or add to your story. She won’t think less of you for it; you don’t have any obligation to keep a PSOs’ fantasy going. There’s no need for you, the client, to create another member account or name either. Just share new information, switch things up, tell her the truth, change characters.

For those of you who want to continue the fantasy calls with your fantasy PSO and have more “real talk” or counseling type calls with her too, just let your favorite phone sex operator know that. There’s no need to have one PSO for fantasy calls and another for other calls. In fact, I advise against it. Letting her get to know you better, sharing your multiple interests and facets, just makes for better calls period.

2 thoughts on “"My Wife Doesn’t Understand Me" & The Other Little White Lies Of Phone Sex

  1. Nuala

    I think this is one of the most useful pieces of advice on this site. I’ve had callers who, by my notes, have invented entire stories about themselves during each call. It would be a mistake for me to say “Hey wait, last time you told me something different.” I just update my notes. I recently had a caller who had me with a detailed cuckold story. When the call ended he told me that it was all bullshit, that he wasn’t even married. I told him “Fantastic-you get the whole point of phone sex. Next time if you call me with a different story, I will just roll with it.”

    Reply
  2. Nuala

    I think this is one of the most useful pieces of advice on this site. I’ve had callers who, by my notes, have invented entire stories about themselves during each call. It would be a mistake for me to say “Hey wait, last time you told me something different.” I just update my notes. I recently had a caller who had me with a detailed cuckold story. When the call ended he told me that it was all bullshit, that he wasn’t even married. I told him “Fantastic-you get the whole point of phone sex. Next time if you call me with a different story, I will just roll with it.”

    Reply

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