Tag Archives: social media

Shadowbanned On Twitter? What You Need To Know

With the recent changes to Twitter policies, more and more folks are concerned about the so-called shadowbanning. Shadowbanning, also known as stealth banning or ghosting, is when your tweets are hidden from conversations aka hashtag searches. In other words, your Twitter account is visible, all the tweets can be seen – except when a person clicks a hashtag and your tweet (including the hash, of course) is not to be found. Similarly, your tweets will not show up in threads and conversations. All of this naturally neutralizes your ability to be found and therefore participate in conversations.

Other nasty side effects of being shadowbanned include not having notifications of your @ mentions delivered to the account you mention, your own account not showing up in searches for it, and your most recent images not being shown in the most recent grid, etc..

It should be noted that Twitter is not the only social media site or digital community to use shadowbanning; it’s just that Twitter has been the largest social media site remaining open to adult folks, so its shadowbanning impacts us the most.

Shadowbanning has a long history of use. Originally, it was used in online communities to keep spammers at bay — without tipping them off that they were being subtly blocked. It is designed to ban the comments of specific users whilst keeping the user ignorant that they have been banned.

Since shadowbanning is designed to keep the banned in the shadows of knowledge, not even knowing they have been so banned, you might have to use a tool to discover it for yourself. Here’s a free way to do that.

How does shadowbanning happen?

It appears one of the primary ways your tweets can be shadowbanned are the dreaded sending of “reports” of tweets. While based on user reports, Twitter then uses artificial intelligence (AI) to attempt to discern things, such as mature or controversial topics, which get other users to report, mute, or block an account.

It’s important to note that there’s no human judgment made here. Hence the additional concerns with new Twitter policies regarding sex. As noted at YNOT:

The sections dealing with non-consensual nudity and unwanted sexual advances may be the most relevant to the adult entertainment industry. As Starr himself admitted in the email, entire porn genres are dedicated to non-consent and stalker fantasies. Nevertheless, Twitter has expanded its definition of non-consensual nudity “to more broadly include content like upskirt imagery, ‘creep shots,’ and hidden camera content,” Starr wrote.

“We will immediately and permanently suspend any account we identify as the original poster/source of non-consensual nudity and/or if a user makes it clear they are intentionally posting said content to harass their target,” Starr stated in the email. “We will do a full account review whenever we receive a Tweet-level report about non-consensual nudity. If the account appears to be dedicated to posting non-consensual nudity then we will suspend the entire account immediately.”

Starr also noted it’s nearly impossible for Twitter to distinguish between real and faux non-consensual nudity, so “[w]e would rather error [sic] on the side of protecting victims and removing this type of content when we become aware of it.”

In a departure from previous policy, Twitter’s safety team will not require a report from an alleged victim before suspending an account for non-consensual content. Adult industry companies that produce non-consent fantasy material need to be aware the proposed new policy could be weaponized by anti-porn activists, competitors, dissatisfied customers and people who simply enjoy creating drama.

These new policies are ambiguous and subjective enough — without trading human involvement for AI. Yet, even if your account is not shut down for dealing with such (or similar) fantasy material, reports (complaints) — especially multiple reports — could lead to your account being shadowbanned. And since the act of shadowbanning users is to keep them in the dark about it, Twitter offers no official help.

Shadow banning, it should be noted, happens to mainstream folks too. And it’s here that we may find the solution to shadowbanning on Twitter. Tania (of When Tania Talks) reports on a tip from Milly (of Mini Adventures) that seems to work:

So what was this genius idea? Well, apparently the world revolves around money. Milly found that by contacting the Twitter Ads team and suggesting that she wanted to place an ad, but her hashtags weren’t working resulted in her Twitter shadowban being lifted. This was done within two hours of contacting the Twitter Ads team.

Apparently, just asking about the situation — not actually paying for ads — works. (Though, if you are shadowbanned, even paying for ads might be a worthy solution!) Though it should be noted that many adult accounts won’t be able to buy Twitter ads, if you’re stuck in shadowbanned land on Twitter it may be worth giving this a try. (At least you could open a dialogue.)

All of this shadowbanning — and general signs of the pornocalypse — is just additional proof to me that one needs a website of their very own. Yes, participate on other sites, playing by their rules. But never be entirely dependant on the practices, policies, and whims of another site.

Are You Using The NiteFlirt Affiliate Program Correctly?

I don’t like singling anyone out, but I continue to run into this problem with new clients, followers on Twitter, and the like. So, rather how this whole phone sex help blog started, I am making this post so that I can quickly refer folks here for help…

I see many of you are using the NiteFlirt (NF) affiliate program — which is great! (Why miss the chance for extra money?!) However, more and more I am finding that the link folks are using in Twitter profiles and other promotional efforts are incorrect. Folks are using an affiliate link to NF in general (example) — not an affiliate link to their own profile (example) or any specific listing (example).

This means that when a person (i.e. potential caller) clicks the link, they are not sent to “you”. Yes, if the potential caller joins (and otherwise qualifies), you may still earn affiliate profits — but you may have lost the potential caller as a new client in the process.

The main purpose of marketing yourself using the NF affiliate program is to capitalize on the opportunity to earn extra money off your new caller who is also new to the phone sex platform. Best case scenario: you capture a new client as well as an affiliate payment (and learn a little something from the affiliate program data as well).

Middle of the road option is that the guy who clicks the link is already a member and he calls you; you earn money off a new client, but do not make any affiliate money.

The last ditch effort affiliate back-up plan is that the guy who clicks the link joins, spends enough to qualify as a payout for you — but doesn’t call you or otherwise become your client. Sure, you’ll only get the one time affiliate earning (which is a nice $50); but not a new client with a lifetime of earnings.

Since you are running a phone sex business, with this affiliate program (and potentially others) as additional revenue streams, I recommend the focus be on marketing yourself.

Hence, I recommend changing that NF affiliate program link on your website, in your Twitter profile, etc. so that folks can find you.

From speaking with a number of you, it’s clear that many understand the premise, but just misunderstand how to properly make or use the correct affiliate link to promote yourself.

This image should help:

Along with promotion your NF profile and/or listings, you can also promote your pay to view games, Goodies, etc.. Just login to the NF affiliate program and scroll further down the page to see the options; click on the little triangle/arrows to expand the section & see individual choices with link codes.

What Influences Phone Sex Caller Decisions?

As The Wall Street Journal reports, “Media consumption habits continue to shift rapidly, with mobile devices, social media, streaming services, and binge-watching redefining the landscape.”

That’s not likely earth-shattering news to you; but what is interesting about Deloitte’s Digital Democracy Survey are the insights you can put to use in terms of marketing your phone sex business. Particularly the fact that for millennials (ages 19-32) recommendations from their social media circle and online reviews now carry more weight than TV advertising.

Most of us cannot afford TV ads anyway. But look at what holds spots #3 & #4 — those are things you can use and leverage! These findings were also seen in the phone sex caller survey results.

According to my phone sex caller survey, phone sex callers most definitely do not make phone sex recommendations to their family & friends. And adult services are definitely limited in terms of what social media can be used. However, you can make the most of client feedback (and phone sex review sites).

While some platform sites, like NF, do not allow you to post or share member names, you can still refer callers & potential callers to your feedback pages via links. If you are lucky enough to have actual clients using social media, they can share their reviews of you — and you can then share them yourself. And you can use good old fashioned testimonials on your phone sex website too.

Tips For Creating & Selling Erotic Audio

My consultation clients know that this phone sex superhero’s personal weakness is making erotic audio files to sell. I know the mechanics, the tech side, of making them. I have, on occasions, made them for regular clients. I understand the monetary value of selling them. But what I, and many other PSOs, struggle with is what to record… What do I say to a stranger I do not know? I have tried reading stories I’ve written; but as I do not know who is listening, I end up sounding like a librarian at story time with toddlers. I know that may flip a few switches, but, honestly, they sound silly to me. ;)

Who better to ask about this than a professional who produces and sells erotic audio files AND a regular consumer of adult audio? Enter Muse, who has been making such audio recordings for six years, and Alice Wonder, a consumer of erotic audios. (If his name sounds familiar, it’s because he’s the man behind Alice Wonder Miscreations who recently launched Naughty.Audio mentioned here.) I asked both of them to share their insights and experiences — happily, both were generous enough to agree.

I know you are just one person, but what do you think customers are looking for when they purchase erotic audios?

Muse: Anonymity, ease of use; not having to interact, really.

Alice Wonder: I was raised in a very puritanical environment, and I am a naturally shy person. That combination makes it difficult for me to ask a PSO to fulfill a particular fantasy I have or if she is the right PSO to help me explore something. However by listening to her audios, and she discusses a particular kink, I feel safer discussing it with her when I call. For me, audio recordings give me a feel for the imagination of the PSO and whether or not we enjoy the same kind of role plays. I want my mind stimulated on a call. They also give me fantasy inspiration.

In addition to helping me find the right PSO to call, I also particularly enjoy tease audios for the sake of the erotic stimulation. I like to close my eyes and just listen.

I know you are just one person, Alice, but what are you looking for in adult audio?

Alice Wonder: Personally I like to be surprised. If the first time I listen to it I can predict what is going to happen, I may still enjoy the audio but I really prefer it when I can not figure out what is coming next. I like audios that have a fun aspect to them. Fun is positive and puts me in a very good mood.

On Twitter we discussed that there’s more feedback with live one-on-one phone sex calls than with recordings. (I’ve written about this on my phone sex promo Tumblr too.) This sort of live interaction is what I thrive on; the lack of it is what makes me, and other PSOs, so uncomfortable…

Alice Wonder: You know, I personally love giving feedback on phone sex calls, and when I read that discussion on Twitter I realized that I often do not give feedback on audios. I have given feedback on custom audios; but on non-custom audios, when I have given feedback at all, it been very short. I wonder if there is a psychological reason for that. I am going to try and find out.

After all these years in this business, I know something as little as hair or shoe color can be a big deal to a client. How do we know what to say, what buttons to push, when we don’t know who is listening?

Muse: Simple, we don’t.

I make things that appeal to me. And, I’m gonna get “meta” here, I think about my work as a catalog. So, I think, “How will this look when I stop?” Because Internet pirates will share and keep me ‘around’ forever. I’m also a writer, so I tend to have themes going throughout my work.

Should recordings be conversational, like leaving a voicemail message to a lover? Should they be performances or readings of erotic stories, with varying voices and the like? Should they me more voyeuristic, providing the sounds of sex? Should they be more like guided masturbation sessions, oral assignments? All of the above?! …I know the real answer is that it’s up to the performer’s own style — but based on your experiences, is there a “best practice”?

Muse: I do Erotic hypnosis, so I feel there’s a point where I go from clinical to teasing…

However, when I read erotica, as I have on Amazon, it’s more like a lover.

Alice Wonder: My favorite audios are those where the entertainer makes the audio feel like she is addressing me, leading me through a fantasy she created for me.

Do you think specific fetishes or niches are better for naughty adult audios?

Alice Wonder: This is hard to answer. I actually like to do exploration by listening to audios in different categories just to see if it turns me on. My personal favorite categories are cock-tease, coerced blowjob (Mistress coercing a straight submissive to give one to a man of her choosing), and erotic mind-fucking. However I like to listen a wide variety just to see what I like. That was one of my motives with Naughty.Audio, I wanted it to be easy to select a category and find several audios by different performers to listen to within that category.

Muse: Erotic hypnosis is amazing. I’m branching out and offering video — just my mouth in lipstick — blowing kisses, while I do monster girl themed hypnosis.

Is there an ideal length for an erotic recording?

Muse: I do shorter files of about 12 minutes; but some are 20-30 minutes.

Alice Wonder: When the audio is intended as an audio teaser for marketing, it should probably not be longer than 5 or 6 minutes. That’s long enough to build our desire, and leave us with that desire for wanting more.

When it comes to teasers, you mentioned that 5 or 6 minutes is a good length. That seems like quite a long time for me to talk to an unknown stranger who cannot converse back with me! Is a minute or two OK for a voice sample recording?

Alice Wonder: What I meant was that it shouldn’t be longer than 5 or 6 minutes. Many are shorter, and that’s fine. Around 3 to 4 minutes seems fairly common, and that is including her giving her website, phone number, and rate at the end.

For paid audios I do not think there is an ideal length. Well, I guess there is. If they go over half an hour, they probably should be split up into separate audios of 10 to 15 minutes. That lets me buy one to see if I like the series, and buy the others later if I do. If I already know I will like the series, it lets me buy the entire series at once for a small discount and feel good about having saved a few bucks.

Is there a preferred audio format?

Alice Wonder: From a strictly technical perspective, Ogg Opus. It provides extremely high quality at a much smaller file size than other common audio formats. However it is still relatively new, and a lot of players (e.g. iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc.) do not support it. Chrome, FireFox, Opera, foobar2000, and VLC do support it, however. Though Safari and Internet Explorer do not. Support looks like it is coming soon for Edge.

From a player support perspective, AAC is the best. When you come across an audio file than ends in .m4a it usually is AAC. It allows high quality for spoken content at a much smaller file size than MP3 for the same audio quality, and it is supported by every browser.

As a buyer, what price do you expect to pay for a “standard” adult audio? For a custom erotic audio?

Alice Wonder: For non-custom audios, I generally feel a dollar a minute is fair for audios under half an hour, but I have zero market research on whether or not that is a good price point. For custom audios, twice her phone sex rate. Again, I have no market research. Honestly, I usually use free teaser erotic audios as a tool to find PSOs I want to call and/or inspire fantasy. I do buy audios, but not terribly frequently.

How do you calculate your pricing?

Muse: I used to only do it by time, but I’ve spent SO MUCH on my equipment! Now I just go with my gut. If I want $20 for a file I’ll get it.

Do you create and sell custom audios? If so, do you charge more for them?

Muse: I do custom audios. It’s $50 a recording; no haggling, no 20 minute mark. I may not set a file length. Yes I charge more. Maybe because I’m working on a clock — I promise barring death or sickness the custom audio will be done in 3 days.

I know a number of adult content producers who offer custom works, including custom audio. And I know that adult content makers often put those custom works up for sale; which they can do as they own the copyright to the works. This seems ideal — then you know just what a client wants, can provide it, and perhaps may make a little more off your efforts if others buy it as well. But how do clients feel about this… Does such a practice bother you?

Alice Wonder: It only would bother me if I wrote the script. If she wrote the script, it wouldn’t bother me at all. If I wrote the script and she offered me something like another audio for free then it wouldn’t bother me at all. If she was a PSO I considered an online friend and she asked, then I would feel a sense of pride and would not want anything in exchange.

On sites like NF, you can sell erotic audio as a Goodie (a digital store item, similar to purchasing a “clip” of adult video), a Pay-to-View message (via a “Buy” button), and callers can pay per minute to listen to a “recorded call.” Other platform sites offer similar options. What are your experiences with each of those sales methods? Is one better than the other?

Muse: I loathe the recorded listing. I can’t honestly tell you why, I just… do. That option made more sense before pay to views… I love pay to views. I’m warming up to Goodies, as they allow you to group similar themed content. For example, cuckold fetish bags sell well.

Alice Wonder: Delivery of audios is a sore thumb issue for me. Custom audios are often delivered by e-mail and that has caused a lot of issues as they often are a larger file size than my mail server allows for attachments.

For non-custom audios, I like to be able to download them.

However what I really want (and want to create) is an audio store that lets me listen to any audio I have purchased in the past in my web browser, just by logging in to the system. I think that would be better for privacy, because it means I do not have to have the audio files on my local computer if I don’t want them there, and I think it would be good for the performer, because the listener could be easily alerted to new audios the performer has created when he logs in to listen, and the performer could potentially be given statistics telling her which audios customers bought that they listen to frequently. Download of course should always be an option.

To clarify, I haven’t bought erotic audios from NiteFlirt; I’ve bought from LDW and I’ve bought custom audios from PSOs directly.

[Just so you (and others) know, some of these issues mentioned, they can be avoided or addressed via NiteFlirt, where purchases are stored in your account in your File Player. You can download, or just stream from there. (This includes other media, like videos, as well.)

Also, regarding custom works, when I sell audio (or custom stories), I typically ask for a deposit via a Payment Request. Once that payment is made, I begin creating. When done, I send the finished work with the balance due in a Pay to View. That way, the client receives the item as soon as they make their payment. It avoids schedule/time difference delays as well as issues with file size. (Similar options are on most phone sex platforms.)]

What is likely to turn you off as a buyer?

Alice Wonder: It is really annoying when I purchase an audio and then have to open it up in an audio editor to remove noise and/or peak normalize it so the volume is proper. It has happened to me several times, and is one of my pet peeves; especially since the result is never as good as it would have been if working from the master. I would buy more if I was not scared of that somewhat frequent problem.

Aside from the technical issues, what else might turn you off as an audio buyer? Let’s say you have not purchased from a particular performer before but you see an audio listed which seems interesting, arousing… What sort of things might deter you from making that first time purchase?

Alice Wonder: Good question! I do not know the answer — but I do know I am turned off if there is no way to find out something more about the phone sex operator. If they do not have a blog/Tumblr that they use… If they either do not tweet, or if the only tweets they do have are quite obviously just auto generated.

If I can see how they react to people, it makes them more personal to me.

In general, what reassures you to go ahead and make a purchase?

Alice Wonder: Brutally honest here, lust. Something makes me really desire it.

The first erotic audio I ever purchased, the artist had a series of six and she ran a promotional that allowed us to download the first two for free in exchange for signing up at her site. I eventually bought the entire set because the first two left me wanting more.

Another time I purchased, it was a foot worship audio from a different performer. She wrote a blog about it where she had the beginning of the audio in text and it tantalized me into buying the audio.

To the PSOs, like myself, who feel awkward talking into a microphone to reach an unknown listener, what advice would you give?

Muse: I’m a writer, an erotica writer. So, I can script. I recommend it. But honestly, just jump in try it. It doesn’t hurt and you can always delete it.

If you try and feel it’s lacking, message me via NF. I do freelance script writing for a fee. My script services start at $5 depending on depth and topic.

Thanks to you both for sharing!

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Yes, I am on Twitter! @PhoneSexSecrets

News Regarding Wishlists, Gifts, & Tips

With all the talk about gifts & tips (or tributes), platform percentages & issues, payment options & costs, I wanted to highlight some new options…

GiftRocket

GiftRocket, an online means of giving gift cards (which can be converted to cash via a bank transfer or a credit to their credit card in a matter of a few days), now has launched a custom url service. For those not familiar with GiftRocket, you likely want to know a few things…

GiftRocket Is Safe, Secure, & Anonymous: The gift giver need only have the gift recipient’s email address in order to send a gift. And that’s all they will see; no banking or other info is shared. Also, the person receiving the gift only sees the gift sender’s email address — and any information they wish to send.

GiftRocket Fees: There are no fees for the person receiving the gift; however, gift givers pay a small fee of roughly $2 and 5% of the gift amount. “In certain cases, the fee may be different depending on several factors.” However, the fee amount is displayed at checkout so there is no confusion.

GiftRocket Location: Unfortunately, GiftRocket is not an international service; meaning if you are outside of the US, you are not currently able to use it.

As for GiftRocket’s new custom link option, here’s my example. It which comes with a custom shorter URL, grock.me/PhoneSexSecrets, which is perfect for use on social media sites, especially with Twitter’s 140 character limit.

This new GiftRocket service was likely prompted by both PayPal’s new PayPal Me service as well as SquareUp’s Cash.Me service. I never, ever, recommend PayPal* for phone sex or anything adult. And Cash.Me** isn’t an option I’d recommend either. While Gift Rocket has no mention in their terms of service that prohibits any occupations, I would make it absolutely clear to your clients that use of GiftRocket/GrockMe is only for gifts/tips and that they should keep all messages/comments clean. And, if you are doing the financial domination thing, well, use at your own risk.

If this seems too risky, then go with a company that actually had sex workers & adult entertainers in mind when it was created.

DeliveryCode

As I shared on Twitter, DeliveryCode now allows you to convert your gifted vouchers into cash. For those not familiar with Delivery Code, it’s the only wishlist service where you can shop from virtually anywhere (any store) and your personal information, including your delivery address, is securely hidden from the buyer. Additional need-to-know:

DeliveryCode Is Safe, Secure, & Anonymous: The whole shopping / gifting site is based on anonymity. And, contrary to what you may have heard when the site started, Delivery Code does indeed use HTTP Secure (https), encrypted communications security.

DeliveryCode Fees: Again, fees are paid by the gift giver.

DeliveryCode Location: As a company, DeliveryCode is based in the UK — but is open internationally and allows international sales, though not all countries are allowed/supported. Again, if you researched the company in its early days, you may have heard about some issues in shipping costs. To clarify, here’s what DeliveryCode says in their terms about shipping costs:

A delivery charge is added to every wishlist purchase to cover any shipping costs incured from the 3rd party retailer. It is a set fee which does not differentiate between retailers. The exact fee is based on whether it is domestic or international delivery and is also dependent on the currency of the product. Our delivery charges have been calculated based on average retailer delivery charges.

Again, these charges would be paid by the gift giver.

However, should you become excited by the idea of shopping internationally for your gift wishlist items, items sent from a different country may require you, the recipient, to pay duties and/or taxes.

Another caveat, DeliveryCode does not accept auction items on wishlists. This is for the obvious reasons of bidding and time-frames. (Personally, if such sites are your thing, I would save such wishlist items for your blog/website/tweets — and use GiftRocket as a means of getting the amount gifted.)

Another caveat: no Android App. Yet, anyway.

Overall, it would seem that in terms of being a sex worker, DeliveryCode is the most accepting and therefore has the least risk.

Yes, I am on Twitter! @PhoneSexSecrets

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

* PayPal should be avoided at all costs by anyone in the adult entertainment industry; 1) we are NOT welcome there, 2) unless you have a business name and mailing address tied to a banking account which is not tied to your personal information you are not anonymous, 3) PayPal is not a bank and so can freeze your entire account and claim all money in it — even that which is not tied to anything adult related.

** You can get booted or banned from the Cash.Me service, including loss of funds, if there’s a perception that you are either A) using this as payment for services or products or B) are believed to be involved in any adult industry. According to two different clients, Cash Me has booted PSOs using the gift-giving URLs based on client comments. Once, a client sent a tip to the operator along with comment stating “Thanks for the story”, which, apparently, was deemed “a transaction”. Another time, a “pay pig” felt guilty and notified the Cash Me that his payment was for a findom. In both cases, the operators’ accounts were cancelled, the money not deposited, their debit cards blocked, and both women were banned from the site; the clients’ accounts remained just fine. *sigh*

Ad Rate Increase A-Comin’!

If you follow me on Twitter, then you know that I will be increasing the price for advertising at the Phone Sex Tumblr on February 1, 2016. Traffic is up, and now that the Tumblr posts (as well as the Twitter phone sex promo account tweets) also go out on the Rebel Mouse Phone Sex Page, there is even more exposure.

If you want to get in on the current prices, go here and buy now. You may purchase up to three months out to get the savings now; otherwise, you’ll be paying the increased rate on February first.

NF, You’re Tweeting All Wrong

The other day, this Tweet appeared on my Twitter timeline:

As you can imagine, I felt the foam forming at the edges of my mouth.

In fact, for weeks I’d been trying to ignore other similar tweets…

But that one discussing which fetishes pay better pushed me over the edge, forcing me to let a rant out.

Why would you discuss the business side of phone sex in front of callers or potential callers?!

Now, you might argue that NiteFlirt has two audiences, callers and Flirts, and so publicly addressing them with one account is fine. Except for the fact that most consumers of phone sex do not wish to see how the sausage gets made, so to speak. And even when they think they wish to, it’s bad for your business. Even when you are not discussing your pay rate or aspects of your character creation, you are focusing on negative issues — and 140 characters is not the best way to deal with concerns positively. Such negative things leave a bad taste.

At best, discussing business aspects in front of callers disrupts the mood that creates a hard-on. At worst, it removes the veil of fantasy.

Certainly all of this is more ethical than others. (Some companies don’t even exist yet, but are actively tweeting & retweeing about phone sex, i.e. Call Siren.) But even when your marketing and customer relations are ethical, you have to ask yourself, “Are they effective?”

I’d like to appreciate NF’s efforts to increase awareness and traffic at the phone sex platform; I really would. But they keep doing it so wrong.

Since they don’t understand how to blog, how social media works, or how the Internet works, it’s pretty clear the folks at NF don’t really know how to market themselves to a specific target audience. Which is why I am glad they are not in the practice of paying for advertising, paid posts, etc. as other platform sites are doing. They’d likely get that wrong too.

More PSOs Should Be Like Santa

I’ve got a long post about phone sex operators & social media in draft stages, but I just had to note this gem from Stacey Alcorn in 5 Steps to Working a Holiday Party Like Santa — and it was too long for me to tweet!

Santa would never show up at a home and tell the children there what he wants for Christmas. That would be absurd: Santa knows that Christmas is not about him.

Likewise, the networking event you’ll attend is not about you. It’s about everyone else in the room. When you meet people at an event, ask lots of questions about what they do for work, fun and happiness. Inquire how you can help them achieve their dreams.

Whether or not you realize it, blogging, tweeting, messages at phone sex platforms, etc., are not all about you. Yup, even if you’re a femdom talking to clients, this applies.

Oh For Gawd’s Sake, Learn How To Properly Blog

Not to be all bitchy-mcbitch-pants or beat a dead horse or anything, but…

I don’t think NiteFlirt (or whoever is in charge of their blog) really understands what they are doing with a blog &/or social media. I mean it is a chronic problem. And it’s starting to work my last nerve.

another-messed-up-niteflirt-blog-post

This latest example includes a blog post about “news”. It’s no longer news. The very video they use dates to 2012; it’s over two years old. But I would be inclined to forgive them the creative definition of “news” to create content if:

A) Their whole blog post wasn’t an obvious attempt to fetch search engine bots to phone sex listings rather than to entertain or enlighten readers/members — actual humans — with said “news”,

and

B) If they didn’t, once again, feed the search engine spider bots inaccurate information about NF.

[W]e know that no technology could ever replace the amazing pleasure of a human touch. What we offer can’t be found in any Chinese hospitals.

Why would you even suggest that phone sex provides the “pleasure of human touch”?! Phone sex is sex work, but it does most definitely does not involve touching the client. (Even alluding to a Flirt touching a client sounds like “arrange a meeting in the real world” — which is so very-very against NF’s own terms of service.)

Is the “pleasure of human touch” supposed to be in reference to the client’s own hand? Then say so! “Masturbation” would be a far wiser word to use in terms of humans searching online.

And that last line? What does that mean? That there’s no human touch at Chinese hospitals? That there’s no masturbation at Chinese hospitals? That there’s no phone sex allowed at Chinese hospitals? …Plus such phrasing and the use of a negative “can’t” evokes feelings of comparisons. Surely NF knows that it can’t compete with hospitals of any sort, right? Why end your post on such an ambiguous and, frankly, odd note?

Lessons: Write for people, not spiders. And, for pity’s sake, if you are going to try to feed spiders, feed them the correct information. Sheesh.

For the love of gawd, NF, hire me or someone else to educate you so that you can promote your phone sex business right.

TalkToMe’s Unfair & Unethical Attack On NiteFlirt

Clearly trying to capitalize on NiteFlirt’s latest policy announcement , TalkToMe (TTM) sent an email alert of their own members, or at least to their PSOs (called “Talkers”), entitled Your Voice, Your Choice!

talk-to-me-email

[Normally, I modify the font — but since they sent their email in comic sans (which is a much mocked and even hated font), I kinda felt like I needed to preserve it!]

Talkers, no one has the right to tell you how to make your money — not your phone company, not your customers and certainly not your billing & marketing service.

Adult Entertainment websites banning their “Flirts” from listing multiple links on their own personal websites and social media is UNFAIR and UNETHICAL. If these companies truly wanted their agents to succeed, they’d recognize every Talent’s right to promote themselves as they wish, and support their freedom to engage fully in social media. Companies who try to prohibit things like this are afraid of competition. We are not.  We believe in our site and our service. 

TalkToMe.com welcomes all Talkers, from every competing platform. Please try us and compare us! With over 20 solid years of experience in Adult Entertainment, we created our website with YOU in mind. We truly believe it is the best way to earn money talking on the phone — and we continue to customize our features according to Talker needs and preferences.

TalkToMe.com would NEVER ban our Talkers for listing with multiple companies, nor for promoting more than one listing in your personal accounts. To the competition, we say:  Bring it on!

For years now, there’s only been one decent option for independent Talkers — that’s never been good for an industry.  Whether it’s automobiles, airlines, or long distance service, giving consumers a choice has always led to better prices & better product. We’re confident we’ve created the next level in virtual, interactive Adult Entertainment (plus fantastic customer service), and we’re thrilled to welcome you to our adventure!

Don’t worry, we won’t try to tell you what you can & can’t put on your personal social media (we’re too busy integrating over a million high-traffic phone lines to spy on you anyway). Remember:  You deserve to make the most money possible, period. No matter how much traffic a company sends you, they have no right to mess with your ability to fill downtime.

Thank you being a TalkToMe.com Talker, we appreciate your efforts and wish you the best luck and the highest earnings no matter what website you’re on.

May the best platform win!

It’s fair — and often a great idea — to capitalize on a competitor’s weakness or exploit a competitor’s perceived weakness. But if you travel that path, you also expose yourself to risks. In other  words, you’d better do it right. And TTM did it wrong. All wrong.

Aside from reading more like a sales pitch to join TTM rather than an update for members, there are even bigger problems with this message. Let’s deal with the misleading and downright false information first.

False Statements TTM Makes About NF:

1) NiteFlirt is not “banning their ‘Flirts’ from listing multiple links on their own personal websites and social media.” Their policy is about links from NF’s site, phone sex operator profiles and listings, to personal websites and social media accounts. Lots of websites, phone sex platform sites included, have similar policies to prevent traffic leaks (as well as passing along SEO & PR juice) to competing companies.

2) TTM’s claim that NF is prohibiting PSOs from “listing with multiple companies” and “promoting more than one listing” is equally untrue. Even if NF wished for that, they have no control over such things. But they can, and are, taking steps to protect their members from leaving NF and taking their money to other companies.

3) NF is not trying to “tell you what you can & can’t put on your personal social media”; NF is merely stating their terms for what can & cannot be linked from their own site.

But there are even more problems with TTM’s email.

Along with misrepresenting their competitor’s weakness, TTM is also misrepresenting their own policies.

Facts About TTM’s Policies:

1) According to TTM’s own Talker Policy, “You will not use any banner advertisements or “pop up” windows or create or include links to sites which involve e-commerce, marketing, solicitation or sale of any items of any kind, whether related to or outside the scope of your Talker listing.”

talk-to-me-linking-policy

How many PSO websites, social profiles, blogs, etc., refrain from solicitation or marketing? Isn’t that rather the overall point of them? And even if you employ a very soft touch form of marketing, how many of us review and link to sex toys that are for sale — that’s ecommerce. And so are listings for competing sites and services.

Doesn’t it then seem rather appalling for TTM to say that “no one has the right to tell you how to make your money”?.

2) TTM’s policy also states that Talkers “will not place any link or other contact information on our Site to facilitate communication outside of our Site.”

talktome-contact-policy

Any decent website or blog has a means of contact — be it a form or an email address listed. And any social media account has private chats, direct messaging, and the like. That’s the whole point of social media: To. Be. Social. To communicate. So, according to TTM’s own policy, Talkers may not link to their own social media accounts and personal websites.

So much for TTM recognizing “every Talent’s right to promote themselves as they wish, and support their freedom to engage fully in social media,” right?

3) The above rules, and many others, are all placed beneath TTM’s primary policy for their PSOs:

talktome-talker-policy

1. In addition to the Terms and Conditions, you agree to comply with the following requirements in your use of our Site.
Without limiting any other remedies TalkToMe.com may have, TalkToMe.com may, in its sole discretion for any reason or for no reason and without notice, immediately modify or terminate your access to, membership in and use of the Site especially if you have violated any of the following requirements each of which you must agree to as a condition to your use of our Site

That means that breaking any of the other linking rules means you are in danger of being tossed or banned from the TTM platform.

Since TTM opted to not only use the words “unfair” and “unethical” but to type them in all caps too, it seems only fair and ethical to call them on their flagrant misrepresentation of NF’s policies and the denial of their own prohibiting policies.

And I have to ask them, “Just who is prohibiting things out of fear of the competition now?”