PSO Help: Dealing With Negative Feedback, Ratings &/or Reviews

After a few months of running the phone sex review site, some things have become quite clear: some phone sex operators don’t know how to properly handle less than glowing reviews.

Just as you can make the most of your positive reviews, you can make a real mess out of less than favorable reviews. In fact, you can make things even worse.

I’m sure you heard about the bakery who was featured on a TV show, how they received a bad review and had a complete meltdown and responded to the review by leaving incredibly insane comments. Thanks to word of mouth, that whole bad scene lives on in infamy; thanks to the Internet, it is perfectly preserved for anyone who Googles “company on cooking show freaks out” (which is exactly how I found that link to the story). Well, this can happen in any industry — including services such as phone sex.

More’s the pity, the whole PR (public relations) nightmare could have been avoided.

As a favor to these PSOs, I have not posted their incredibly ignorant replies. Yes, not posting their replies was doing them a favor. Those comments just make those phone sex operators look bad. And, I’m not about shaming them while ruining their businesses.

thumbs_down-bad feedbackI even took the time to tell most of them this information, but they didn’t seem to understand. Or care to learn. They just continued to rant in comments and emails to me. (And don’t think you can guess who wrote these comments either; shockingly, several of these comments came from PSOs who simply didn’t like one line or comment in a review that was rated 3 or higher! Yes, people tend to remember the negatives more than the positives, especially when it is about ourselves, but why, why, why would you go out of your way to attack something positive?!) However, I am hoping that you care to learn, so I am sharing some of these poor responses with you as lessons in what not to do should you receive negative feedback or reviews about your phone sex services.

Do not make fun of callers for “jerking off.” That’s rather the point of most phone sex isn’t it? Mocking masturbation just ensures you won’t get called.

Do not make fun of a caller’s phone sex fantasies. Even if a potential caller doesn’t share the reviewer’s fantasy, anyone considering using the services of a phone sex operator may already be worried that their fantasy is “fucked up” — if nothing else, you’ve just made sure they won’t call you. Not even the most masochistic submissives are interested in this sort of treatment. When they are reading reviews and feedback, looking at ratings, they are not in subspace or in a fantasy frame of mind; they are trying to evaluate and decide if they should invest their money and time with you.

Do not call people names or categorize them in order to insult them. For example, when you respond with “you sound like a old black man” you’ve not only just ensured old men, black men, and old black men won’t call you, but you’ve turned-off everyone else who is reading and offended by ageism, racism, etc. From How to Respond to a Negative Online Review:

It doesn’t pay to show a public display of anger when you receive negative press online, because, as [Jason] McDonald points out, your comments are on display for the world to see.

“Remember that you aren’t only talking to the person who gave you the bad review, you are talking to the dozens of other people who are reading your response,” he says. “You always want to take the high ground.”

Don’t post in haste or in a heated head-space. Statements like, “YOU DONT NO WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT”, whether auto-correct on your device is to blame or not, this reflects poorly on you. And all caps is just rude yelling. Too often people don’t stop and think — and instead create and escalate things into flaming wars. McDonald’s advice:

Can’t calm down? Take some time. You don’t need to respond right away. Talk to a friend about how you are feeling, go for a walk or engage in another work task to take your mind off of the review. Go back and respond when you feel calm and collected.

(See also How to Stop Overreacting.)

Remember, Sticks & stones may break your bones; and name-calling really hurts you.

Don’t threaten to “leave him a bad review.” First of all, you can’t. Poor reactions like these are precisely why sites like NiteFlirt and eBay have removed the option for PSOs and sellers, (respectively) to leave their own feedback or to reply to the feedback of others. And another reason why I won’t publish such comments at the review site. Secondly, are threats, carried out or not, the charming, welcoming things that invite others to give you a chance?

Do not make statements like “I’m not going to apologize because you didn’t enjoy our call.” Maybe you don’t need to apologize; I think maybe you do. Yes, it takes “two to tango” in phone sex. But you are one of those people. You bear responsibility — more than half, actually; for as the intimate service professional, you should know when things aren’t going well, when you are not well-suited to make this caller happy, and you should politely put an end to the call (perhaps, even, refer the caller to someone else). Take a cue from this article in Forbes, Why Negative Reviews Can Be Good For Business:

Respond to reviews in a proactive and polite manner. Always keep a polite and respectful tone when responding to reviews. Engage with customers diplomatically and try to resolve issues whenever you can. Respond publicly when possible to show everyone that you strive to keep your customers satisfied. Future reviewers may be more likely to behave politely when they’re assured that you read and respond to reviews.

Inc. also offers tips on this, saying you may not need to apologize, but that you should acknowledge the negative review:

[Acknowledge] (“I understand that your experience with us wasn’t what you wanted it to be”). Then take it offline to provide a resolution. (“Here’s how you can reach me directly. I’d like to understand your perspective more and work to resolve this to your satisfaction”). Thank people who leave a positive review and say you appreciate their time and business.

Dynamic Business notes that  research indicates that 20% of consumers that write negative reviews will become a brand loyal customer and another 30% will react by writing a positive review — if they receive a positive response from the business. They offer the following tips:

  1. Ensure your response is customer focused and avoid getting defensive, it comes across as insincere and uncaring

  2. Address each problem identified and try to provide a solution

  3. Offer to them a chance to get in touch with you privately either by email or phone

  4. Always be courteous and polite to the customer, apologise if necessary

  5. Give them a reason to try your product or service again eg. a deal or free trial

Don’t whine about how a review or feedback negatively affects your business, that you need the money, etc. Reviews are to help people interested in paying for a product or service. They are designed to save consumers time and money; they are not designed to make you money. If you were actually concerned about your business and income, you’d be constructively reading customer and client feedback for concerns to address, ways to improve. From Inc. again:

When many consumers think something is wrong with your business, there is. Period. And if you’re not responding, respectfully and effectively, online and offline, then these “Negative Nellies” will turn into your company’s death knell faster than you can say “one star.”

Do not cut & paste your feedback from a phone sex site, especially from a site like NiteFlirt which clearly states in their rules that such an action is in clear violation of TOS. By all means, feel free to mention that you have positive feedback, high ratings, fans or whatever. (Oh, and when you mention such things and say that it “speaks for itself,” stop there. That’s what that phrase “speaks for itself” means.)

Do not complain about a review being “posted without your permission”; no one needs permission to post a review or related materials. Besides, reviews matter, even bad ones.

In short, do not be attacking and rude. A potential caller reading such a comment will be far more put-off by what you are saying than whatever a review or rating says. Every comment and response you make helps a potential caller make a decision whether or not to call you.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *