Category Archives: Advice and Opinions Of Others

Twitter Policy Changes: About Canned Promo Tweets

As I warned you on Twitter, as of the 23rd of March, Twitter no longer tolerates multiple identical tweets. Not on one account, not across multiple accounts. The fine folks at dlvr.it aptly & concisely convey the changes:

Posting Duplicate Content to Multiple Twitter Accounts is no longer allowed If you manage more than one Twitter account – you can no longer post the same or similar original content to those accounts. Posting the same content more than once to a single Twitter account is not allowed If you are like many major brands, and recycle the same tweet more than once on a single Twitter account - you’re now in danger of suspension or termination from Twitter.

Obviously, these changes are intended to stop troll army & bot action activities such as those we saw with Russian attacks & proliferation of Fake News. But these changes will affect phone sex operators and other providers using Twitter to promote their businesses.

The biggest impact here will be those automated services such as NiteFlirt “Shouts” & other “I just sold” automated tweet notices from platforms such as iWantClips.

So far, I’ve yet to find a platform covering this policy change at Twitter, and what, if anything, they plan to do about “Shouts” and similar automated promotional tweets. In my opinion, now is the time to stop using them. Unless you want additional reasons to find yourself more than shadowbanned, i.e. find yourself suspended or deleted from Twitter.

But, of course, I would say that, right? I’ve never been a fan of those automated things.

While I completely understand the appeal of such hands-free, “live” promotional tools for providers, often providing content (tweets) when providers were busy or away, the results are typically spammy looking. With today’s Twitter rules, it’s best to just avoid the potential problems.

However, I do understand that these promotional tools can work.

If they are used properly.

Case in point, the lovely Taylor, aka housewifeswag. She’s recently tweeted about just how well those automated clip sales tweets (specifically Many Vids “Promo Blaster”) works for her. Check out the whole thread here:

The point here that Taylor hasn’t acknowledged, is that she is an avid & entertaining tweeter who regularly interacts with her fans and followers.

This is why her Twitter page doesn’t look like a bunch of promotional spam. (Shown at left; screencap taken a couple of days ago as I didn’t want to post so much in one day! Since then, Taylor’s had a death in the family, but still, her page is typically genuinely fun!)

While we are all hoping platform sites will take appropriate actions regarding the automated promotional tweets, we cannot count on them.

The safest way to protect ourselves, our Twitter accounts, is to turn off the automated tools. The risks right now are too great to do otherwise. (And, with the current potential purge of sex workers on platforms, removing the automated risk of multiple identical tweets at least removes some of the mud – if not blood – from the muddy waters.)

But you still can tweet about being available for calls, having sold a clip, etc. Just write a unique tweet each time to remind your fans and potential customers that your content is available and selling. You can still include a photo and, of course, provide a link – always a good thing to do so folks can find what you are promoting. And a pic too. And you can also retweet yourself – once.

Just remember to do as the profitable providers do: Be sure to mix those promotional tweets in with other tweets/content.

***

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Yes, I am on Twitter! @PhoneSexSecrets!

New additions to the site:

New, easier to schedule consultations, coaching, & tutoring sessions page!
A concise listing of all my instantly downloadable phone sex whitepaper guides!
A list of my most popular other services for PSOs — including rates and buy now options!

 

How To Deal With SESTA FOSTA

A few days ago, SESTA / FOSTA passed, creating dismay and fear within the sex worker community. While it appears that phone sex operatorsindie clip makers, and cam performers are not the target of the legislation, there are likely to be some changes for those providers too. Not just because the law is poorly written – and destined to hurt those they say they are protecting – but because the law is aimed at online platforms. Many sites are already taking action. Some are disappearing sections of the sites; some sites have entirely disappeared. And it is clear from the folks behind the law, that this is aimed not just at paid sexual encounters – but at sex itself.

Since the passage of the legislation, I have been compiling and sharing news and tips at the Phone Sex Secrets Twitter account. As that account is *knocks wood* not dealing with Twitter Shadowbanning, I hope I am signal boosting facts and tips for sex workers. Along with the retweets, I’ve been sharing some tips myself. But since shadowbanning is a real thing, because not everyone uses Twitter — and because this legislation is targeting online sites, I realize tweets may not be safe. So I am going to post a number of helpful links and tips here.

Three of the most practical threads on Twitter were from Lamina Vua, HarlotAdvocate, & Liara Roux. The Harlot Advocate’s thread has been preserved at Fairy Whore Mother. Liara Roux’s thread has been posted at Tits & Sass, so you can read it there. Lamina Vua’s thread, screen-shot images, are presented here so they do not get lost.

My tips:

#1 Make a list of trusted Twitter accounts — and follow them, so even if they are shadowbanned you can see their pages. Also on that list, include URL – so you can find them, even when they are shadowbanned & do not show up in searches (either by name or hastag).

#2 Do the same with their websites & contact info so that if they (or you!) are deleted from Twitter, you have a method of connecting.

#3 Keep a list of trusted publications & resources (i.e. organizations, not persons) which you can count on for industry news. One such place for this issue would be Survivors Against Sesta.

Additionally…

I recommend continuing to tweet and be active on the platform sites you are using so that clients can continue to find you — especially if you are moving to other platforms, etc., and wish for clients to be able to find you.

I also have threads & posts which you can share with clients. I know I recently advised against being too negative or sharing too much activism — but this is one of those times when it is worthy of mentioning actions clients can and should take. It helps them to continue to support you. (And sometimes sharing what someone else wrote removes the “sting” of negativity a bit!)

Both the thread on Twitter and the much more in-depth post on Tumblr are written specifically for clients — both in terms of education and actions they ought to take.

***

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Even if you’ve been here before, you may have missed the new additions to the site:

New, easier to schedule consultations, coaching, & tutoring sessions page!
A concise listing of all my instantly downloadable phone sex whitepaper guides!
A list of my most popular other services for PSOs — including rates and buy now options!

Viceland & Slutever’s Beginner’s Guide To Camming

Last week, a promo for an episode of Viceland’s Slutever show went around on Twitter, causing quite a bit of upset. The promo tweet was for a Slutever episode (Season 1; Episode 6) on cam girls – and what was shown had many camgirls up in arms about the lack of sex positivity & whorearchy – if not outright whorephobia.

Unfortunately, like many movie trailers and television promos, the clips shown are removed from their context — a practice which does a huge disservice to the audience. And, in this case, was deemed harmful to cam performers themselves. Because I know this is often the case, I refrained from comment until I watched the episode in question.

As most readers, followers, and clients know, I’m not a cam performer; but in watching the Slutever cam girls episode, I was able to get some context for the “upsetting” promo-tweet. And as I suspected, it was not as bad as it seemed.

It’s of paramount importance to note that while the Cam Girl Boot Camp Trainer, Lilia Zavala,  of LA’s Studio 20 did correct the show’s host, Karley Sciortino aka @Slutever, about being “classy” and neither showing nor saying ‘cunt’  — Zavala did so in terms of training within the confines of Studio 20’s brand. (FYI, Studio 20 is based in Romania.)

Such things were not a statement or condemnation of women or cam performers who opt to use the word “cunt” or show it off. It was simply a matter of Studio 20’s cam girl brand being more about playful tease than other more explicit or direct forms of adult entertainment. This is what brands do. They differentiate themselves in the marketplace. And, as seen earlier in the show, there are more graphic & direct cam girl offerings presented – without any judgment.  As Zavala herself noted, “There are other platforms they go to for that. But this particular website I work with is very classy.”

So bitching about that one point of view — out of context — should stop. Ideally, it never would have happened — context is always important! (Personally, I think the selected bits were to showcase the hostess’ “slut” image.)

The Case Of The Misunderstood Promo is now solved. But I’m not done yet. Since I watched the whole show, I have a few other comments to make.

Some of the cam girl’s comments on the popularity and future of camming included noting that camming is “interactive,” “personal,” and “more of a reality show than porn – my reality porn.” Rather common — and spot on. At least for those who prefer visual adult entertainment.

As Andra, PR Manager at Studio 20, noted, camming’s not all about being a traditional beauty aka cis, white, blonde, Barbie image. “She needs to be fun, be smart. It doesn’t matter if she’s white, black, chubby, skinny, big boobs, small boobs, because we found out that in this business everybody’s somebody’s type.”

Amen.

When asked if most cam sessions result in something sexual happening, Andra at Studio 20 noted that about 60% of the time it does. (Yup, that means 40% of the time it is not.) Andra also noted that the draw of camming is building a relationship — and she feels this will only grow as ” a lot of people don’t have the time or want relationships in real life nowadays.”

Sciortino seems surprised.

(Honestly, after so many decades in sex work, I am continually shocked and amazed at people who are shocked and amazed to discover that sex work is a lot like being a therapist or at least simply providing companionship. I should no longer be surprised by this response; but I continue to be!)

At Studio 20 L.A., we meet a top banking, fulltime cam girl, Nikita Banx (@nikitabanx on Twitter). She says the top two interests or kinks she sees are feet and small penis humiliation (sph). She also points out that she’s on cam for 8 hours a day, 40 hours a week.

This is when Slutever/Sciortino realizes just how broad the job of being a cam girl is. “You have to be a therapist, you have to be sexy, you have to be like a girlfriend, but you also have to be like a dominatrix if someone wants it.”

To which Andra replies, “You have to be a woman. That’s all in the job.”

(Which might just be my favorite bit from the show! All the labor women provide that sex workers are savvy enough to profit from!)

The show’s host responds, “This is stressful.”

And Sciortino hasn’t even realized yet that girls at Studio 20 don’t have to take care of as much of the business side of things, including marketing, as that’s what Studio 20’s 50% – yes, 50% – take covers.

That’s the corporate camming side of things. Now the show delves into the indie side of camming.

We are now meet Ona Artist (@OnaArtist on Twitter), a woman who started her cam career on Instagram. One day, she posted a butt pic — and her world changed. Here, it is worthy of mentioning, that we are introduced to Ona as a professional photographer is taking photos of her. In other words, she spends money to make that money. It’s not just selfies which create the fame and popularity of over a million followers. No matter how great your ass is. What Artist says is that you need “photos that pop, photos that really hit the algorithm well.” And they don’t just take themselves. Clearly, Ona knows how to work the social media system.

To this, Slutever/Sciortino responds, “Wow. Being a cam girl is like a lot of work randomly.”

Randomly?!

Uh, whatever.

It’s a business. That’s not so random.

But then Slutever/Sciortino redeems herself. She says she has respect for Ona and cam girls and their “slutty industriousness.”

Slutever/Sciortino asks, “Do you think that camming is the future of pornography?”

Ona Artist responds, “Yes I think it’s the future – I think it’s already here, actually.”

Now Slutever/Sciortino wonders what that means for “us, the horny masses.”

So our hostess interviews Dr. Melinda Chateauvert aka The Whorestorian (@whorestorian on Twitter), author of Sex Workers Unite! A History of the Movement from Stonewall to SlutWalk.

Slutever/Sciortino asks about the popularity of camming in adult entertainment.

Melinda “Mindy” Chateauvert responds, “I think that camming has been popular for a long time and I think that the rise of camming was aided by not only changes in technology, and the fact  that  a lot of women who were interested in camming could do it by themselves, but also for a lot of women this was a safe way of doing sex work but not actually having contact with clients.”

Since Chateauvert isn’t into slut-shaming or any of that crap, I take this simply as a fact. Some simply do not wish to be hands-on, full-service sex workers. And that’s OK. Sex work — and the type of it — is a choice.

Chateauvert is also asked if camming will replace pornography. “I think it is very separate. It’s a different kind of performance but I don’t think one will replace the other.”

(I feel the same way about phone sex. It is different, it is its own thing. One doesn’t necessarily replace the other because there are unique aspects and connections to each form of entertainment.)

But back to Slutever and Chateauvert as they discuss the ever-surprising notion of not masturbating but “just talking with a sex worker.”

Chateauvert, The Whorestorian, says, “People want to have someone who they think they can talk to about things that they may not want to share with a person they consider respectable.”

Slutever thinks she’s catching on, and tentatively asks,”So in a way, the sex worker is non-judgemental because they’re in a position which is like sort of seedy…”

Chateauvert clarifies. “Right. I mean their view is a sex worker has experienced everything or knows everything and is not going to make the judgement – and also because we expect sex workers to be confidential and that’s, you know, a super kind of rule number one in the trade is you don’t betray a client’s secrets.”

Absolutely!

After noting the “slutty confessional” nature of camming, Slutever realizes that clients are private about their “voyeurist hobby” (something my survey data supports), — yet we still manage to have a brave male client willing to discuss his camming habit. Well, a bit… Evan, one of Ona Artist’s biggest fans, does share that why he watches. It’s “a little bit of sunshine” during the day, an “escape.” (Which is why I will always caution you about the subjects to blog and tweet about!)

As you might imagine, watching Slutever as she watches Evan watch Ona is more than a bit awkward — thankfully, we jump back to the Whorestorian.

Our hostess asks Dr. Chateauvert, “Do you think that camming will fill in for actual human relationships?”

Kudos for Chateauvert’s reply: “No. I don’t see us going to some sort of sci-fi future where 12 people live in the same room and are only talking to other people via Internet, but I think camming actually facilitates interaction in a way that is much more comfortable and safer and open.”

Ditto many other forms of sex work.

Overall, this specific episode of Viceland’s Slutever, is totally worthy of watching. Even with all my spoilers. *wink* Because, you know, it’s a television show with images — moving images. And because what stood out to me might not be what’s important to you. So do watch it if you’re at all interesting in camming.

Just note that you’ll have to get over the vocal fry of the host (and a few other people).

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Even if you’ve been here before, you may have missed the new additions to the site:

New, easier to schedule consultations, coaching, & tutoring sessions page!
A concise listing of all my instantly downloadable phone sex whitepaper guides!
A list of my most popular other services for PSOs — including rates and buy now options!

Yes, I am on Twitter! @PhoneSexSecrets

What Are You Reading? (Or: Self-Employment Means Self-Education)

Everyone always talks about how mainstream can (& has!) taken it’s business cues from the adult industry in terms of both marketing and tech innovations. But it works the other way too.

I don’t just mean overly general “how to market your business,” “blogging,” “tech,” or “social media” articles either. Yes, those are perfectly fine; much of that general information can apply to what PSOs need to do for their businesses too. (So long as you read or listen to such things aware of how the potential censorship will limit or impact your adult business.) But also look to other specific industries as they relate to your business.

Selling newsletter, content, or website subscriptions? Look at the publishing industry.

Need help converting your listings? Read about landing pages & copywriting.

Want to sell more pay-to-views, audio recordings, clips, etc.? Read articles about retail & online commerce.

Know your target audience? Read articles about selling to those specific demographics.

Remember, phone sex is not only part of the adult industry, but the service industry as well. Discover how the service industry is surviving and even thriving in the Internet age.

What other industries or market do you feel align with your brand? Luxury? Hospitality? Entertainment? Education? Read up on them for tips on connecting with your target market. Expand your reading areas and you’ll expand your knowledge base — and when you test or implement those ideas you can expand your business reach and profits too. You might even discover new possibilities for services to offer or be inspired to create a new niche for yourself!

I spend roughly 10 hours a week reading business materials (or listening to podcasts) across a wide spectrum of industries. Aand that’s not including any reading I do for sex education — or the occasional book for personal enjoyment (I wish I had more time for the latter!) Some of what I consume shows up in my tweets (@PhoneSexSecrets). But don’t just count on me or who I follow on Twitter. (I do have a secret mainstream Twitter as well; you might want to do that too to connect with mainstream folks!) Investigate & read on your own too. Such investments in time will be worth it.

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Even if you’ve been here before, you may have missed the new additions to the site:

New, easier to schedule consultations, coaching, & tutoring sessions page!
A concise listing of all my instantly downloadable phone sex whitepaper guides!
A list of my most popular other services for PSOs — including rates and buy now options!

 

Surprise! Cam Girls (PSOs & Other Sex Workers) Want To Build Wealth & Feel Empowered By Their Work [Infographic]

Stripchat recently polled a cross-section of webcam models for insight into their lives as not only performers but as female entrepreneurs in this emerging industry & created an infographic from the data. While I’m not a cam expert (at least not in cam sites; I know a lot about one-on-one camming on sites such as NiteFlirt), I do believe a lot of the info presented here would be similar to that of phone sex operators and other sex workers — if anyone cared to ask us.

Look! Women get these jobs for the same reason most humans get jobs: to build wealth & feel empowered. (Which is a bit redundant; money is empowerment.)

Of course the infographic came with a press release:

The infographic, “Female Empowerment – Cam Model Insights That’ll Blow Your Mind…” details the motivations for becoming webcam entertainers, and most women polled (87%) said they “feel empowered by their webcam careers” while others appreciate the freedom of working from home and building wealth as their own bosses’.

“As a new company that’s focused on our cam models’ best interests, we decided to take an informal poll of performers in order to find out what motivates them and what we can do to help create a more successful business for them,” said Stripchat Head of Business Development Jim Austin.

The majority of entertainers polled by Stripchat work 30 hours a week or more (44%), are married with no kids (42%), focused on saving for retirement (45%); experienced models earn $300 a day and can make up to $128,000 a year (on average) and the majority of entertainers hold down jobs in the corporate sector (52%), with an eye on entrepreneurship.

“People are really starting to understand the importance of building wealth and preparing for the future in a business with so much flexibility in terms of hours and location,” said Austin. “Stripchat is ideal for models to use for selling not only live cam shows but videos and photo gallery content as well.”

My comments? Well, 150 is a small sample, but at least it gives you an inkling… Your mileage will definitely vary in terms of pay. And I definitely would urge that 34% to tell their partners; such lies of omission rarely turn out well. Plus, how can your partner support you if they don’t know what you are doing? Just leads to more isolation. Something that’s tough enough in sex work.

PS For more on what camgirls do:

What’s It Like To Be A CamGirl?

What Women Want To Know About Being A CamGirl

What Influences Phone Sex Caller Decisions?

As The Wall Street Journal reports, “Media consumption habits continue to shift rapidly, with mobile devices, social media, streaming services, and binge-watching redefining the landscape.”

That’s not likely earth-shattering news to you; but what is interesting about Deloitte’s Digital Democracy Survey are the insights you can put to use in terms of marketing your phone sex business. Particularly the fact that for millennials (ages 19-32) recommendations from their social media circle and online reviews now carry more weight than TV advertising.

Most of us cannot afford TV ads anyway. But look at what holds spots #3 & #4 — those are things you can use and leverage! These findings were also seen in the phone sex caller survey results.

According to my phone sex caller survey, phone sex callers most definitely do not make phone sex recommendations to their family & friends. And adult services are definitely limited in terms of what social media can be used. However, you can make the most of client feedback (and phone sex review sites).

While some platform sites, like NF, do not allow you to post or share member names, you can still refer callers & potential callers to your feedback pages via links. If you are lucky enough to have actual clients using social media, they can share their reviews of you — and you can then share them yourself. And you can use good old fashioned testimonials on your phone sex website too.

Tips For Creating & Selling Erotic Audio

My consultation clients know that this phone sex superhero’s personal weakness is making erotic audio files to sell. I know the mechanics, the tech side, of making them. I have, on occasions, made them for regular clients. I understand the monetary value of selling them. But what I, and many other PSOs, struggle with is what to record… What do I say to a stranger I do not know? I have tried reading stories I’ve written; but as I do not know who is listening, I end up sounding like a librarian at story time with toddlers. I know that may flip a few switches, but, honestly, they sound silly to me. ;)

Who better to ask about this than a professional who produces and sells erotic audio files AND a regular consumer of adult audio? Enter Muse, who has been making such audio recordings for six years, and Alice Wonder, a consumer of erotic audios. (If his name sounds familiar, it’s because he’s the man behind Alice Wonder Miscreations who recently launched Naughty.Audio mentioned here.) I asked both of them to share their insights and experiences — happily, both were generous enough to agree.

I know you are just one person, but what do you think customers are looking for when they purchase erotic audios?

Muse: Anonymity, ease of use; not having to interact, really.

Alice Wonder: I was raised in a very puritanical environment, and I am a naturally shy person. That combination makes it difficult for me to ask a PSO to fulfill a particular fantasy I have or if she is the right PSO to help me explore something. However by listening to her audios, and she discusses a particular kink, I feel safer discussing it with her when I call. For me, audio recordings give me a feel for the imagination of the PSO and whether or not we enjoy the same kind of role plays. I want my mind stimulated on a call. They also give me fantasy inspiration.

In addition to helping me find the right PSO to call, I also particularly enjoy tease audios for the sake of the erotic stimulation. I like to close my eyes and just listen.

I know you are just one person, Alice, but what are you looking for in adult audio?

Alice Wonder: Personally I like to be surprised. If the first time I listen to it I can predict what is going to happen, I may still enjoy the audio but I really prefer it when I can not figure out what is coming next. I like audios that have a fun aspect to them. Fun is positive and puts me in a very good mood.

On Twitter we discussed that there’s more feedback with live one-on-one phone sex calls than with recordings. (I’ve written about this on my phone sex promo Tumblr too.) This sort of live interaction is what I thrive on; the lack of it is what makes me, and other PSOs, so uncomfortable…

Alice Wonder: You know, I personally love giving feedback on phone sex calls, and when I read that discussion on Twitter I realized that I often do not give feedback on audios. I have given feedback on custom audios; but on non-custom audios, when I have given feedback at all, it been very short. I wonder if there is a psychological reason for that. I am going to try and find out.

After all these years in this business, I know something as little as hair or shoe color can be a big deal to a client. How do we know what to say, what buttons to push, when we don’t know who is listening?

Muse: Simple, we don’t.

I make things that appeal to me. And, I’m gonna get “meta” here, I think about my work as a catalog. So, I think, “How will this look when I stop?” Because Internet pirates will share and keep me ‘around’ forever. I’m also a writer, so I tend to have themes going throughout my work.

Should recordings be conversational, like leaving a voicemail message to a lover? Should they be performances or readings of erotic stories, with varying voices and the like? Should they me more voyeuristic, providing the sounds of sex? Should they be more like guided masturbation sessions, oral assignments? All of the above?! …I know the real answer is that it’s up to the performer’s own style — but based on your experiences, is there a “best practice”?

Muse: I do Erotic hypnosis, so I feel there’s a point where I go from clinical to teasing…

However, when I read erotica, as I have on Amazon, it’s more like a lover.

Alice Wonder: My favorite audios are those where the entertainer makes the audio feel like she is addressing me, leading me through a fantasy she created for me.

Do you think specific fetishes or niches are better for naughty adult audios?

Alice Wonder: This is hard to answer. I actually like to do exploration by listening to audios in different categories just to see if it turns me on. My personal favorite categories are cock-tease, coerced blowjob (Mistress coercing a straight submissive to give one to a man of her choosing), and erotic mind-fucking. However I like to listen a wide variety just to see what I like. That was one of my motives with Naughty.Audio, I wanted it to be easy to select a category and find several audios by different performers to listen to within that category.

Muse: Erotic hypnosis is amazing. I’m branching out and offering video — just my mouth in lipstick — blowing kisses, while I do monster girl themed hypnosis.

Is there an ideal length for an erotic recording?

Muse: I do shorter files of about 12 minutes; but some are 20-30 minutes.

Alice Wonder: When the audio is intended as an audio teaser for marketing, it should probably not be longer than 5 or 6 minutes. That’s long enough to build our desire, and leave us with that desire for wanting more.

When it comes to teasers, you mentioned that 5 or 6 minutes is a good length. That seems like quite a long time for me to talk to an unknown stranger who cannot converse back with me! Is a minute or two OK for a voice sample recording?

Alice Wonder: What I meant was that it shouldn’t be longer than 5 or 6 minutes. Many are shorter, and that’s fine. Around 3 to 4 minutes seems fairly common, and that is including her giving her website, phone number, and rate at the end.

For paid audios I do not think there is an ideal length. Well, I guess there is. If they go over half an hour, they probably should be split up into separate audios of 10 to 15 minutes. That lets me buy one to see if I like the series, and buy the others later if I do. If I already know I will like the series, it lets me buy the entire series at once for a small discount and feel good about having saved a few bucks.

Is there a preferred audio format?

Alice Wonder: From a strictly technical perspective, Ogg Opus. It provides extremely high quality at a much smaller file size than other common audio formats. However it is still relatively new, and a lot of players (e.g. iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc.) do not support it. Chrome, FireFox, Opera, foobar2000, and VLC do support it, however. Though Safari and Internet Explorer do not. Support looks like it is coming soon for Edge.

From a player support perspective, AAC is the best. When you come across an audio file than ends in .m4a it usually is AAC. It allows high quality for spoken content at a much smaller file size than MP3 for the same audio quality, and it is supported by every browser.

As a buyer, what price do you expect to pay for a “standard” adult audio? For a custom erotic audio?

Alice Wonder: For non-custom audios, I generally feel a dollar a minute is fair for audios under half an hour, but I have zero market research on whether or not that is a good price point. For custom audios, twice her phone sex rate. Again, I have no market research. Honestly, I usually use free teaser erotic audios as a tool to find PSOs I want to call and/or inspire fantasy. I do buy audios, but not terribly frequently.

How do you calculate your pricing?

Muse: I used to only do it by time, but I’ve spent SO MUCH on my equipment! Now I just go with my gut. If I want $20 for a file I’ll get it.

Do you create and sell custom audios? If so, do you charge more for them?

Muse: I do custom audios. It’s $50 a recording; no haggling, no 20 minute mark. I may not set a file length. Yes I charge more. Maybe because I’m working on a clock — I promise barring death or sickness the custom audio will be done in 3 days.

I know a number of adult content producers who offer custom works, including custom audio. And I know that adult content makers often put those custom works up for sale; which they can do as they own the copyright to the works. This seems ideal — then you know just what a client wants, can provide it, and perhaps may make a little more off your efforts if others buy it as well. But how do clients feel about this… Does such a practice bother you?

Alice Wonder: It only would bother me if I wrote the script. If she wrote the script, it wouldn’t bother me at all. If I wrote the script and she offered me something like another audio for free then it wouldn’t bother me at all. If she was a PSO I considered an online friend and she asked, then I would feel a sense of pride and would not want anything in exchange.

On sites like NF, you can sell erotic audio as a Goodie (a digital store item, similar to purchasing a “clip” of adult video), a Pay-to-View message (via a “Buy” button), and callers can pay per minute to listen to a “recorded call.” Other platform sites offer similar options. What are your experiences with each of those sales methods? Is one better than the other?

Muse: I loathe the recorded listing. I can’t honestly tell you why, I just… do. That option made more sense before pay to views… I love pay to views. I’m warming up to Goodies, as they allow you to group similar themed content. For example, cuckold fetish bags sell well.

Alice Wonder: Delivery of audios is a sore thumb issue for me. Custom audios are often delivered by e-mail and that has caused a lot of issues as they often are a larger file size than my mail server allows for attachments.

For non-custom audios, I like to be able to download them.

However what I really want (and want to create) is an audio store that lets me listen to any audio I have purchased in the past in my web browser, just by logging in to the system. I think that would be better for privacy, because it means I do not have to have the audio files on my local computer if I don’t want them there, and I think it would be good for the performer, because the listener could be easily alerted to new audios the performer has created when he logs in to listen, and the performer could potentially be given statistics telling her which audios customers bought that they listen to frequently. Download of course should always be an option.

To clarify, I haven’t bought erotic audios from NiteFlirt; I’ve bought from LDW and I’ve bought custom audios from PSOs directly.

[Just so you (and others) know, some of these issues mentioned, they can be avoided or addressed via NiteFlirt, where purchases are stored in your account in your File Player. You can download, or just stream from there. (This includes other media, like videos, as well.)

Also, regarding custom works, when I sell audio (or custom stories), I typically ask for a deposit via a Payment Request. Once that payment is made, I begin creating. When done, I send the finished work with the balance due in a Pay to View. That way, the client receives the item as soon as they make their payment. It avoids schedule/time difference delays as well as issues with file size. (Similar options are on most phone sex platforms.)]

What is likely to turn you off as a buyer?

Alice Wonder: It is really annoying when I purchase an audio and then have to open it up in an audio editor to remove noise and/or peak normalize it so the volume is proper. It has happened to me several times, and is one of my pet peeves; especially since the result is never as good as it would have been if working from the master. I would buy more if I was not scared of that somewhat frequent problem.

Aside from the technical issues, what else might turn you off as an audio buyer? Let’s say you have not purchased from a particular performer before but you see an audio listed which seems interesting, arousing… What sort of things might deter you from making that first time purchase?

Alice Wonder: Good question! I do not know the answer — but I do know I am turned off if there is no way to find out something more about the phone sex operator. If they do not have a blog/Tumblr that they use… If they either do not tweet, or if the only tweets they do have are quite obviously just auto generated.

If I can see how they react to people, it makes them more personal to me.

In general, what reassures you to go ahead and make a purchase?

Alice Wonder: Brutally honest here, lust. Something makes me really desire it.

The first erotic audio I ever purchased, the artist had a series of six and she ran a promotional that allowed us to download the first two for free in exchange for signing up at her site. I eventually bought the entire set because the first two left me wanting more.

Another time I purchased, it was a foot worship audio from a different performer. She wrote a blog about it where she had the beginning of the audio in text and it tantalized me into buying the audio.

To the PSOs, like myself, who feel awkward talking into a microphone to reach an unknown listener, what advice would you give?

Muse: I’m a writer, an erotica writer. So, I can script. I recommend it. But honestly, just jump in try it. It doesn’t hurt and you can always delete it.

If you try and feel it’s lacking, message me via NF. I do freelance script writing for a fee. My script services start at $5 depending on depth and topic.

Thanks to you both for sharing!

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose asap!

Yes, I am on Twitter! @PhoneSexSecrets

Quick – Really Quick – Links For Phone Sex Operators

Honestly, this time I will be quick!

1) I’ve written before about taxes for phone sex operators, but here’s even more info on taxes for freelancers.

2) If you follow me on Twitter, you’ve likely noticed that I’ve been sharing and retweeting a number of links to news stories about sex tech and start-ups. I’m betting a good number of you have been ignoring them, thinking, “I’m a PSO; I don’t need to know that.” But this short post at Eros Blog cuts to the meat of most of these stories. And hopefully you can see the how and why of why I am sharing these things. (Also, it is wise for those of us in the adult industry to keep an eye on the pornocalypse hashtag.)

That’s it — for now. *wink*

(I told you it would be quick!)

Phone Sex Is Sex Work – It’s In The News, & You Can Learn From It

If you’re following me on Twitter, you’ve likely seen my tweets about Margaret Cho’s recent championing of sex workers & their rights. Cho knows what she’s talking about. Before her comedy career took off, she, like Whoopi Goldberg, paid the bills working first as a phone sex operator. After her PSO work, Cho worked as a dominatrix. While Cho doesn’t elaborate on why she left phone sex, she does say why she gave up being a femdom:

“I was lazy,” she said. “I lacked empathy, and,” referencing the job’s requirement for administering floggings and other forms of corporal punishment that a client might request, “I had a bad arm.”

Well, the self-described laziness may be why she left phone sex… Or the bad arm? (Phones back then were heavier!) Whatever the case, I’m thrilled that Cho is putting a positive spotlight on the needs of sex workers.

But still, Cho’s story illustrates that even when you are open to sex work, you may not be well-suited for it. And even when you are good at one form of sex work, you may not be happy with another.

Which brings me to another news story…

Before Lea Grover became a “mommy blogger” (or even a mom), she helped put herself through college by working as a phone sex operator. While she seemed to enjoy the work, found it within her skill set, was challenged and even amused by it, loved the casual way she could work from home, felt shameless enough about it to confess her work to her parents, and even felt it was a safer alternative to other jobs, Grover eventually left the work because she found it depressing.

In the original article at Cosmo, Grover confesses:

But after a few months, I started to feel depressed each time I logged my phone onto the call network. I dreaded the phone ringing, and I went from eating healthy as I worked to binging on ice cream and cookies, pretending to find strangers’ masturbation fascinating.

It took a long time to figure out what was bothering me about my job, but after listening to some restaurant industry friends complain about their patrons, it struck me. Nobody, not a single caller, had ever said, “Thank you.”

And none of them had ever said, “Goodbye.”

They were so thoroughly wrapped up in their exhibitionism, in themselves, that I might as well have been a pre-recorded moaning device. And while I didn’t exactly expect callers to care about me as a human being, night after night filled with dozens of people hanging up on me mid-sentence as though I didn’t exist started to really hurt my self esteem and self confidence.

So I stopped doing phone sex and got a job working retail, like a “normal” college student.

In case you skimmed that — or missed the irony — let me point something out: Grover finally put a finger on just what was bothering her about her work as a PSO after hearing the complaints of others working in another service occupation, the restaurant industry. (And then she left for yet another service industry, retail, which I can tell you, isn’t any better.)

On any give day, any given shift, any person working in a restaurant (front of the house or the back) goes without the expressed thankful recognition of the work that they do for the people they serve. And if there’s no appreciation for those working in the noble profession of feeding someone — arguably some of the most nurturing work a person can do — how can you expect it to be any different in sex work where the “work” aspect is largely denied?

It is a sad fact that few people bother to acknowledge, let alone thank, those who serve them. If this pervasive cultural attitude offends or hurts you, you should not be working in any sector of the service industry, period. And this definitely includes phone sex and other forms of sex work, as sex workers are , sadly (stupidly!), largely disrespected the world over.

Since sex work is such a personal, intimate service, I can fully understand Grover’s depression over the lack of recognition of her as a person. Good for her for leaving! As my consultant clients can tell you, I’m aware of how taxing the specialized nurturing work of sex work can be and that I take great pains to address the potential personal and emotional impacts of this work upfront.

But even as I do not in any way blame or condemn Grover (or others) who feel this way about being a phone sex operator (or any form of sex work), I feel it’s important to point out a few things…

Honestly, in all my years of being a sex worker (from escorting to phone sex work), I can count the number of times I’ve endured a departure without a “Thank you,” on one hand. …OK, as it has been decades now, perhaps two hands. Even if it at times it sounds more obligatory than heart-felt, I’m used to being thanked for my services.

And the only times I’ve been hung up on while speaking on the phone was when a caller was shockingly interrupted by a coworker, family member, etc.. He may have hung up in a frightened hurry; but generally he’ll contact with apologies later, often with a tribute. (And if there’s no apology, I do not hesitate to block.)

Why do I believe my experiences have been better than Grover’s or others with similar stories?

It’s all about how you handle your business.

Grover’s use of “call network” indicates to me that Grover was not an independent phone sex operator, but rather was at the mercy of a phone sex company; she just took the calls sent to her. Whether or not this was true for Grover, there are things indie PSOs can do to avoid such terrible callers and clients.

Primarily, it’s all about how you position yourself in the market. Present yourself (via photos, descriptions, blog posts, tweets, rate, etc.) as an easy, quick, and cheap thrill — in cheap publications and at classless sites — and “easy, quick, and cheap” is all you’ll be to prospective callers and clients. They’ll treat you as such, with all the rudeness it implies.

However, if you present yourself as a quality service provider, placing your ads and performing your marketing in more pedigreed places, you’ll attract a higher quality clientele. Live up to those high standards and not only will clients thank you for it, but you’ll keep those classier clients. Phone sex is, after all, a luxury purchase; express how true that is for your individual services and you’ll avoid the many of the rude, bargain-basement, one-minute wankers. The few asshats you do run into won’t burn you out or upset you because you’ll be treated well overall.

(Oh, and avoid working traditional “after bar” hours, when cheap drunks call for quickies too.)

Of course, there are plenty of PSOs who happily bank on short, cheap calls. Rude or not, they take the money and run.

I’m not one of them. I’d rather spend two hours with one caller than try to corral and accommodate dozens of others in the same time-frame. But, hey, that’s me.

Fundamentally, it’s up to you to decide. First, whether or not this line of work is a good fit for you. And then, if you think it is, decide what you can tolerate, what you enjoy, and how to get the callers and business you want. If you need my help with that, I’m available for consultations; rates & info here.

Is this your first time here? You may wish to read this post and my Statement Of Purpose.

If You’ve Been Considering Arousr…

Gracie Passette has an excellent review of the sexting (and phone sex) service Arousr — which includes info on how much it really costs as well as how much chat, cam, and phone hosts can make: The Sex Kitten Arousr Review.

UPDATE: My Arousr interview is here.